How to gracefully deal with exits as a leader / Part 1

Few things test a leader more than watching a valued team member walk out the door. This is part 1 of a two-part series - today we focus on voluntary exits (i.e. a team member hands you their notice). Next week we’ll tackle the equally challenging involuntary exits.

🔎Spot the early signs

No leader can control someone else’s #career choices, but, you can tune into the signals that someone might be considering a #change:

• Drop in engagement or curiosity

• Reduced participation in team discussions

• Subtle disengagement from long-term projects

What to do: Have a genuine discussion

“I’ve noticed you’ve been quieter lately, how are you feeling about your current challenges and goals?”. This conversation might re-engage them or it might confirm that a change is coming giving you time to prepare.

💸Counteroffer or closure?

When someone resigns, the instinct is to throw money or titles at the problem.

Take a moment and ask yourself: Are they leaving for something, or from something?

If it’s the latter, a counteroffer is often a short-term fix. HBR research shows that more than 70% of employees who accept counteroffers leave within a year. Make the choice for strategic reasons, not emotional ones, and be crystal clear on expectations.

🤝Exit interviews done right

Most leaders leave exit interviews to HR wasting a great chance to get unfiltered insight into your leadership, your #team, and your #culture.

Ask:

• “What made your decision final?”

• “What would have made you stay?”

• “What advice would you give me as a leader?”

🏗️Rebuilding & replacing

Before rushing to post the #job ad, use the leaver’s perspective:

• What were their biggest challenges in this role?

• What would they have done differently?

• Who would they #hire if they were in your shoes?

  
  

If appropriate, involve them in handover planning or reviewing the new role description. This ensures smoother onboarding and avoids repeating mistakes.

👋Leaving well: the art of graceful goodbyes

People remember how you treated them on the way out far more than on the way in.

Celebrate contributions publicly if appropriate, express gratitude sincerely, and support their next chapter.

Your remaining team is watching. How you handle the goodbye sets the tone for engagement, loyalty, and trust.

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⁉️Question for you: What was the hardest voluntary exit you had to deal with and what did you learn from it?

🌟Sparking Leadership #24: a weekly series on human-centered, sustainable #leadership. Follow for real talk and practical tools. In the meantime, lead with spark!